I remember visiting her house in Florida with my cousins and sleeping on the screened in porch all together, it always felt like a treat.

I remember playing in the front yard as she watered the plants in her garden just before an afternoon rain. I still remember the smell of the rain on her sidewalk.

I remember her reading the paper each morning as she ate her English muffin and drank her coffee.

I remember her Swedish pancakes and how Kristen, Eric, and I would compete each time to see who could eat the most. I remember how we had to wait our turn for the next one to show up on our plates.

I remember how she’d pat my hand and say, “Such a good lil’ girl.”

I remember her allowing Kristen and I to put her makeup on for her. Yep, she looked like a clown afterward, but she’s the one that owned blue eyeshadow.

I remember her taking us to the lake during the summer and putting up with our never ending giggling in the back seat.

I remember living at her house for a few months and getting the chicken pox on my 6th birthday.

I remember how she loved to dance, especially to polka music.

I remember her love for pretty things in general.

I remember when she first started forgetting things and how it made her so scared and frustrated.

I remember her meeting Drew for the first time and she kept calling him “she.” It turned into a big joke and she’d laugh so hard and keep trying to say “he.”

I remember Charley and I taking her out to Blue Springs and paddling around in a canoe. I had to constantly remind her to keep her hands in the boat because of the alligators.

I remember painting her toe nails and her saying how beautiful it was and that she’d never had that before.

I remember Drew teaching her how to blow bubbles and how he was so patient with her.

I remember the last Christmas I spent with her and how she was confused. I remember how she just sat quietly until Charley started playing Christmas music on his violin. She thought it was the most beautiful thing she’d ever heard.

I will always remember how precious the moment was that she smiled at my new babies and touched their hands. You could see she was trying so hard to understand who we were and why there were two. I told her I couldn’t believe it either. I kissed her head and let her sleep.

I will always remember that that was the last day I saw her aware, that I helped her drink water with a spoon, that I kissed her head and let her sleep.

I will always remember Drew singing Twinkle Little Star and Jesus loves me to her, and that I couldn’t keep singing along without choking on my tears.

I will always remember Drew sitting in the chair just watching her sleep and then running back to say goodbye as we left for the day.

 I will always remember saying goodbye, kissing her head, and letting her sleep.